I'll take the high road

"This isn't what I want, but I'll take the high road. Maybe it's because I look at everything as a lesson, or I don't want to walk around angry. Or maybe it's because I finally understand. There are things we don't want to happen, but have to accept; things we don't want to know, but have to learn, and people we can't live without, but have to let go." - JJ, Criminal Minds

It's time to grow up and become who I was meant to be. I've been walking around angry for so long and my anger just continues to build. I have a to-do list a mile long that I refuse to touch simply because each time I do, it just gets that much longer. 

I'm tired of pain, of this anger building inside me, of feeling like this will never end. I refuse to let the world stop me from being happy. I will train myself to do better and be better. I will put myself first for once and be sure that I reach for my dreams, though I have none right now with the exception of getting out of this hell hole. What do you dream of when nothing is as it seems?

JJ's closing statement of this episode of Criminal Minds inspired me to be like her. I will accept the things that have happened and the things that will happen even if I don't want them to happen, I will learn things that I don't want to know, and I will let go of people who I can't live without simply because I'm tired of walking around angry. 

Perhaps my writing, my poetry, my art will rise above this. My words seem so superficial, vague, and general - I cannot pinpoint anything specific because it makes my pain real. And I have been avoiding it for so long that it's time I grow up and move on.

Here's to the memories, the moments that took our breathe away, and the times we shared.