Every second of every minute of every hour of every day I will miss you. 

Your beautiful life was taken too soon. My anger rages inside me. Nineteen is no where near the proper time to die. A trip home to see your family is never the time to die. I cannot even fathom as to what plan God has for you, because my heart is in pieces. You were my cousin, my bestfriend, my parter-in-crime and it's just not fair. What am I going to do without your infectious laugh, your witty sarcasm, or your keen fashion sense? I miss you so much.

My words are all jumbled up inside. I can't think straight. I can't hardly think at all. I see you every where I go. The day after your funeral I went out to eat with Mom -- our waitress's name was Kristi (just like you spelled it even if I always spelled it with a 'y'). Then we went to Gordmans and wouldn't you know it, it was on Allen Drive. I tried to brush off those little reminders until I logged onto Facebook. A purple heart set underneath all the birthday reminders and next to that heart was your name in bold. Stupid game requests: you know how much I hate those damn things.

But I can't bring myself to delete it. Your name. By a heart. A reminder of our love and how much I miss you. I hope you're in a better place and that you're watching down on me (well, not every moment please).

Rest in Peace.
All my love,
Tori